Prayer is ALL i have...

Not a whole lot to report truthfully.  We had our biometrics appt this month.  Now, we wait for the approval.

I would love to go into specifics of our girl, but i can't publicly.  I can say that she now has a "FAMILY FOUND" on top of her picture on the Agency's waiting child's list.  Now it's all in God's timing.

I am feeling a lot of emotions lately.  She is 6-7.  Parenting an older child that has experienced more hurts in her small life than i have in my entire lifetime scares me.  I have prayed.  Micah has prayed.  The kids have prayed.  I KNOW she is our daughter, but I'm still scared.  She's not a baby.  She remembers...

So what am i doing? 

Reading books. 

Reading blogs.  Yeah...they scare me even more at times. 

Facebook groups.  Downright terrifying at times.

PRAYING!!!  Through this short journey, i have experienced the Power of Prayer. 

Sure, i always knew there was power in prayer, but i have FELT it.  For many years my prayer life looked like this. 

BAM.  Life happens.  {{sigh}}  Cry. 

Then i think, all I can do now is "pray" after I have turned to every worldly solution which man has to offer for whatever problem may be facing me.

BUT

These past few months, I have felt the peace that surpasses all understanding cover my fears when i wake up in the middle of the night asking God, "Are you sure??" 

Will it be okay?  I don't know. 

Will i have a rambunctious spitfire join our family and turn our life upside down? 

Perhaps. 

But, what is certain in life?

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! 

We are not promised tomorrow.

But i have more than i need.  I have Jesus.  At the end of this life, i can honestly say, Jesus i listened and by golly, I stepped out in faith.  I TRUST you.  Maybe, it will be a total disaster, but i KNOW when i take my final breath, i will hear Well done, good and faithful servant! And that's enough for me.

But i'm still scared.  :)