As i write this, i am watching a little girl swimming in my pool with her new sisters and brother. Even though her English is broken, they are laughing. They are playing. They are being typical kids.
You would never know that less than 4 months ago she lived in an orphanage that is filled with older kiddos living with more heartache than i will ever see in my life.
They all have a story to tell. Some are sadder than others. Some are terrifying. If we took them to see a shrink, they would be labeled with some scary label with 3 or 4 letters. Now don't get me wrong, these are real issues and shouldn't be taken lightly, but we are talking about kids that have lost parents and suffered trauma that they will carry with them for the rest of their lives.
There WILL be issues.
So often when my friends come up to me and ask how things are going, i give a smile and say,
"Great!!! Everything is so much better than we anticipated."
And there is TRUTH to that statement but we have had some dark days. Brenda wouldn't be in my home if we didn't have issues that we needed to work through.
There are days that are HARD. Adoption is exhausting, expensive, uncomfortable, and some days not rewarding AT ALL.
Do i know what the future holds? No.
Will i have to deal with some sort of attachment issue with Brenda? Maybe.
Will we have to spend years in therapy? Perhaps.
How will this affect my bio kids? I'm not sure.
On the days that i long for what life was like as a Mom of 3, God reminds of Redemption.
Definition: Redemption is the act of buying something back, or paying a price to return something to your possession.
Redemption is costly. Buying back lives costs A LOT. When God set out to redeem us, it killed Him.
But, Redemption is a BEAUTIFUL thing. Jesus didn't call me to an easy life. He didn't promise me the American dream. He didn't promise obeying Him would keep my kids out of harm's way.
The reality of God's Kingdom is that this life is not my own.
This life is about letting Jesus do His thing. He redeems lives, and y'all, He will keep doing it with or without me.
It’s not about me, but I'm honored that Jesus chose me to shine a little of His light into this precious life.
